 In South Africa, the Durban Lesbian and Gay Community Health Centre, supported by Oxfam Community Aid Abroad, is helping young people. For many young lesbian and gay people, 'coming out' is one of the most traumatic times of their lives. Indeed, some describe it as terrifying and painful.
One young girl of 16 reflects: "I had to first admit to myself that I was a lesbian." She remembers thinking about 'telling' a good friend for three years, and then eventually feeling brave enough. "This was a very difficult and painful process. But it was worth it in the end. This experience has given me the courage to live my life openly and honestly as a lesbian."
The Durban Lesbian and Gay Community Health Centre, based in Durban, South Africa, supports lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgendered communities in Durban and surrounding areas with counselling, legal advice, support groups, HIV/AIDS education and advocacy. Many of the Centres clients are young Zulu people, whose cultural systems result in strong beliefs that heterosexuality is the only sexual orientation.
The Centre which is supported by Oxfam Community Aid Abroad has developed a publication Your Guide to Coming Out. The guide shares the experiences of young people in their journey to acceptance by their families, their communities and themselves.
The publication promotes self acceptance and personal safety and it gently encourages readers who may be considering coming out to carefully plan the process and ensure that they will be safe as well as supported.
Your Guide to Coming Out was a response to the stories of many people who called in to the Centre. People such as Matt, 24, who was struck by "how cruel other kids were while I was still in school." He adds: "I became very depressed and withdrawn. I felt so confused and alone. I didnt want to be 'different'. I didn't want to be the names they were calling me." For Matt coming out "was very terrifying!"
Thokozane, a 25-year-old Zulu woman, had similar difficulties. Societal beliefs and misconceptions had prevented her from sharing information about herself with her mother. When she disclosed that she was lesbian to some of her friends, the responses included questions such as "Are you now a boy?" For her, questions of this nature made her "fear what my mother's reaction would be".
Oxfam Community Aid Abroad's support has allowed the Centre to produce Your Guide to Coming Out as well as providing a wide range of much-needed and dynamic services. Sfundo Kahumalo (pictured) is an HIV/AIDS outreach trainer at the Durban Lesbian and Gay Community Health Center. Credit: Matthew Willman/ Oxfam Australia.
For more information, visit the Oxfam website
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